C - Compliment and Nurture

Self-esteem is the foundation of everything we build our lives on.

Try it out!
Practice nurturing yourself today and everyday by doing something just for you which makes you happy. For example, take a 15 minute break today at work to relax with a cup of coffee. Call a friend to chat. Try a new hairdo. Watch a favorite TV show. Notice the smile on your face when you are doing what makes you happy. Feel deserving of that happiness.

H - Here and Now
Anxiety is fear of the unknown and can be a major force that blocks us from realizing our full potential and attaining our goals. Some anxiety is healthy because it keeps us safe; however, anxiety becomes debilitating and unhealthy when it interferes with our functioning in a major life area. Anxiety is generated either by apprehension over the future or by rumination about the past. Anxiety does not exist in the present and so learning how to stay present, through an awareness of your five senses, is key to reducing anxiety in your life. Daily life contains worries and concerns and you cannot eliminate them but learning how to manage them and keep them right-sized will help to propel you down the road to love, success and happiness.

Increase the enjoyment in your life, minute by minute, by staying present.

Try it out!
Make a list of your worries. Determine if each one is a worry about the past or the future. How much of the time do you spend worrying? Consider how much of your life is being wasted by ruminating over the past and feeling apprehensive over the future. Make a commitment to be present with your life.

A- Accepting the Whole
Traits are enduring personality characteristics which are used to describe us, such as sensitive, kind, generous or critical. Traits are shaped by our environment throughout our lives because some traits are valued and others are devalued by the people with whom we interact. The traits we are most proud of are like the Anchors of a ship; they ground us and define us in ways that make us feel valued. Triggers are traits that make us feel defensive and have the potential to create conflict. We try not to express them, but when we do we feel guilt and shame. We acquire true self-acceptance when we recognize that we have every trait and that every trait has value. Our challenge is to find the right fit for each trait.

When you look in the mirror and love what you see, you know self-acceptance.

Try it on!
Notice when you use the word “should”. Repeat what you’ve said but substitute the word “could”. Feel how your message is softened and tension is relieved. “Should” communicates an imperative while “could” communicates permission, possibilities. Feel the difference.

R - Respectful Relations
Developing harmonious relationships in home, work, and social environments is an integral part of the human experience, and is necessary to meet our goals of bringing love, happiness and success to our lives. As human beings, we are relationally oriented and designed to co-exist; so, being able to communicate and get along with others is key. Effective communication requires seeing other people as valuable human beings with shared basic needs as well as unique thoughts and feelings. By using effective communication strategies, such as showing compassion, being curious, and speaking with respect, individuals build trust and form respectful, long lasting relationships.

Communicate respectful intentions which are mutually beneficial and watch your relationships grow.

Try it on!
Think of someone with whom it is difficult to relate. List 5 things you have in common. Consider how you could use these five things to develop a better relationship.

G - Genuine and Authentic
Our social identity is created from a multitude of factors and evolves over time based on our life experiences. Our identity is unique and defines to the world who we are, and who we aren’t. People with integrity are those who know their values and remain consistent and solid with those values. We are often drawn to persons who exude integrity because of their solid, unwavering aura of honor. We also find ourselves drawn to those persons who maintain healthy interpersonal boundaries, persons who are clear about who they are and respectful who you are. Your interpersonal boundary is the place where your identity stops and makes contact with the identity of another person. Think of this boundary as an imaginary “Circle” which surrounds you. It outlines your space and defines where you begin and where you end. Integrity is about knowing what you stand for and owning it. Staying in your “Circle” helps you act with integrity.

We live with integrity when what we think, what we say and what we do are in harmony.

Try it on!
Consider the decisions you’ve made about your life in the last week, small ones such as what to eat or what to buy, as well as large ones that involve ethics and morality. Judge for yourself whether you acted with integrity. Did you stay in your Circle? Were you true to who you really are?

E- Enjoy and Experience Life
Negative thinking is a persistent tendency to view the world in terms of what is missing or wrong rather than by focusing on what is going right. Negative thinking gone unchecked can lead to despair, where we feel hopeless, helpless and passive about our ability to improve our lives. Negative thinking loses its power when we stay in touch with Hope and believe that setbacks are temporary, impersonal and finite. Hope is the driving force in your life when you believe that there is an abundance of good things available to all people, that there is enough to go around in the world, and that you deserve your share of these good things. Joy is a combination of happiness and hope which is expressed in positive energy that is directed outward into the world. Practice living your life with Joy!

Happiness is a choice that requires effort.

Try it on!
List several goals you have currently. Do you believe that you deserve them? What negative things do you tell yourself to avoid working on them? Throw away your negativity and proceed ahead with Hope and Joy. Embrace your life with energy. Give your life direction.